They Call This Drowning.We fell in love;A deep and surgingwatercolor seawith lilac waves thatwrestled with our ailingbodies,and azure air that choked ourlungs.We were in over our heads.
Horology.Like a clock,you said you'd waitforever,but I forgotto replace the battery,now you'rebroken.
Give Me a Portrait.Paint me without aface,because I'm sure youdon't remember mineanyway.
How Love Works.I neverfell in love withyou,you neverfell in love withme.Your demonsfell in love withmine,my demonsfell in love withyours.
Roses Can Change.White roses make youcrybecause they remind youof him.To see you smileand take the painfrom your eyes,I'd prick each of myfingertipsand drip my bloodonto each velvet petalthat adorns the snaking vineso that the red roseswill make you thinkof me.
One Day His Life Will Be a Classic.There's sorrowon his lips,and sonnetsin his eyes.Each scar on his wrist,speaks in fatal monologue.He lives a tragedynot evenShakespeare could write.
Everyone Knows Boys Can't Fly.They told him liesdid not existwhere evil dared not roam,and that if he only spreadhis wings,the wind would hold himup,and make him fly.He stood on theedge,his toes balancedin the skyand with a breath he closedhis eyes,and fell back down toEarth.
I Am Lost.I am lost,I cannot feel.Is this sleep,When I close my eyes?Or is it death,When I rest my head?I am lost,I cannot see.Is this real,When I hear your voice?Or is it an illusion,When I see your face?I am lost,I do not knowWhere I am,When I look ahead.Or where I've been,When I look back.I am lost,I have forgottenHow to speak,When words weigh on my lips.Or how to scream,When terror fills my lungs.I am lost,I’ll never be found.No one noticed,When I went away.They can see me,But I am gone.
Speechless.I wanted to writea poem foryou,but when you leftyou took everything,even the wordsI never spoke.
RawThese fingers never thoughtThey could write poetry,Just like this mouth neverThought it could eat heartsAnd swallow regrets.Your secrets still paintThe inside of my throat,Hieroglyphics of a loveThat left me raw.I can still feel you inMy bones, and I'll keepYou there till the sunTurns to dust and theMoon stops singing herSorrow to the stars.
The DeadI have chemical wakefulness,10 dollars and 27 cents hidden last night,somewhere around the apartment, maybe in the couchor behind the drywall. The red stiff pillows are on the carpet,my chest was stuffed with vibrations and tapered:It's not in the kitchen. Not in our bedroom,but you have forty dollars in your wallet.Your body's in airspace. Maybe you had dinner,your parents' favorite restaurant,or called Richard while you smoked in the parking lot,talking:feather hymns, exosongs, traffic tones,a late ride home, long straight roads, flaking paint,creaking sway, bitter drip, dragging lights,dark skin,a choking fit,his nihilistic faith, a repetitive twitch,how he appreciated with his fists,and you were 23,thought everything was plainor symbolic:"I'll pick up something for dinner,"but I only spend 18.60 at the supermarket.
In grief, you blossomed.When a wind tousled the hairspilling from your hat,though the sun was hotand radiant in your eyelashes,gleaming on your copper cheekbones,shading the angles of your neckwith sharp virtue,we walked two milesto the bus stop."Do you ever think about how people like Ericcan turn out okay? But I don't really know what's differentbetween someone like that and someone whosees shit and repeats every stupid fucking mistake,because I don't think it has anything to do with strengthor willpower or opportunity or fate or God or whoever's been peddlingthe newest life-affirming snake oil.""What do you think it is?""I don't know.""You've been thinking about it.""Maybe. I guess. But I think it might just behow close death seems to you."It was darkbefore the bus arrivedand you asked me for a cigarette,which you smoked with sweetuncertainty.
Insomnia.I’d stay awakeAll nightIf it meant you’d still be breathingIn the morning.
Flawed Canvas.Your lipsleft watercolorstainsall across my heart.My blood isn't evencrimson anymore,its a pale and dyinglilacthat bleeds onto the floorand paints a pictureof you.
Skeletal System.My vesselis empty,as vacant asa gaping gravebecause I put everythingI hadinto loving youand nowI am askeleton.
Dreamscapeyou whisperin your dreamsand i countthe ways you love me,the trickling ofpassionyour unconsciousharborsfor me.
.some people witherwith love;others bloom
UnforgettableFive years of uslearning each other,loving each other,before we took our vowsand began anew. Twenty hours of travelwas well worth it.The paradise we foundin that faraway landtook my breath away. Twelve daysof celebration.Just us,and a cabin in the rain forestoverlooking a black sand beach. Our pale skin pinked under the Costa Rican Sun,the burn soothed under a cloudless sky.We watched glimmering stars,brighter in the absence of city lights.Transformedby foreign tongues and familiar arms.An experience with no parallel.Taking our commitmentand testing itmaking it stronger.I hiked on slippery rocksto get to that special place,to stand underneath that waterfallwith you.To laugh with you,to take in the wonder of the worldin your company.To smile just because…I married you.
.I am whatmy fathertaught me;you'll findthe devil inmy hands.
requiem boys.violet-minded,andromeda-eyed,you lack the need to let go;but i am enough of a burden for both of us.my ribs are in debtand my heart was foreclosed two days agobut warrior,i love you so.and sometimes i wonder whyi am so dumb and numbbecause it's youit's you.
OneI can remember exactly when i first met you.The slight crease in your face as you smiled.If one thing could say something, then that did.I can remember everything.You shaped me. Made me.We grew into each other. We fell apart with each other.I cannot remember anything without you.I can remember exactly when we first kissed.The way your lips felt soft and curious, against mine.If one thing could say something, then that did.I'd live a million miles away.Another life and world away, with you.If I know what love is, it is because of you.
DissociationThe mirror showed her a stranger.
You Had to AskMe, a monster?Let's find out
xi want to kiss youwith the intensity of a thousand universesand i want you to feel the heatof every staron your lips
Who are you?"Who are you?""I don't know."
Beautiful.They say I’m beautifulBecause of the way my crystalline heart reflects light off its fractured surfaceWell, that isn't a reflectionIt’s rejection of the light because it’s all too much to handleThrow myself away into the dark without even a candle‘Cause I don’t want to recognize all the pain I’m inOr realize the truth behind what I am or who I've beenAnd I tried to make things right but I just keep on making wrongI never listened to the angel on my shoulder when she calledI count my tears like they’re experienceAnd my scars like they’re mysteriousAnd that’s a feeling I’ll remember –Watching as you leftWatching as you ended what was meant to be foreverAnd I can see it in their eyes; everyone can empathizeSo they say that I’m beautiful because they don’t know what else to say.But if being broken is beautiful, then it’s the ugliest way...
Poisonous LoveYour love seeps into my skinand crawls into my heart,to eat it from inside out.
Content.I went searchingfor myself,I ended up finding youinstead.